Sleep Training

I was really dreading this. According to different theories, sleep conditioning is very important. If you get your baby to be used to always being rocked to bed or fed to sleep, he or she will always need that to fall asleep. Till recently our TR would not fall sleep unless being rocked to sleep and gently and carefully put down on the bed. It took particularly longer at night and he would wake up at least twice within 30 minutes and scream.

Our baby-rearing bible, a book called “Bringing Up Bebe: One American Mother Discovers Wisdom of French Parenting” written by American mother living in France, four months is a critical deadline for sleep training. In addition, TR weighs more than 6 kg now, and I was coming to my limit of walking back and forth holding him, which could take more than 30 mins at a time. However, I kept giving excuses not to start the training. I would say,  not tonight, next week, after the 3 months vaccination is finished, after we come back from Bangkok etc. As a parent, it is extremely hard to hear your baby cry and scream.

Just less than a week before TR turned four months old, we finally started. It is some kind of our own modified version of “cry it out”. M. FR, equipped with earplugs, would stay with the baby until he falls sleep but no picking up and rocking. First night he cried for 30 mins. I couldn’t take it, and I had to wear a headphone and listen to music…  We actually couldn’t believe that he could fall sleep without being held. The second night, it was 40 mins, third 10 mins, then 20 mins…  It seemed like it’s working to certain extent. It was still hard to hear him scream. Then, one night I was alone at home and experimented by not swaddling him. I followed our usual bedtime routine and ritual: bathing, feeding, reading a storybook and signing. Then, I put him down on the bed. TR rolled onto his stomach and started sucking his fingers. I tuned off the light, told him good night and left the room………………………………..then he fell sleep!!! I heard no cry whatsoever!!!! I held my breath and went to check up on him multiple times. I am still nervous about him sleeping face down, as it is not recommended to prevent SIDS. I observe him during his sleep and he adjusts his head many times to find a comfortable position. We need to be careful to clear his bed of any possible items that could choke him. However, now I am more confident that he is big enough to control his posture.        

There we go. Just like that. It was resolved. No more rocking, no more counting up and down bounces and running to rescue him when he wakes up after 10 minutes. 

He has learned the skill to fall sleep on his own, which apparently is a real skill that babies need to learn.

Since then, it has worked so far with minimum crying.